Saturday 17 March 2018

Dear Elaine - #VicksBabyRub Challenge

Dear Elaine....a letter to myself. What would I tell my younger first-time-parent self by the time the second baby came along  or things I wish I knew as a first time mum? This is for the #VicksBabyRub Challenge

DD1 at two weeks old. 

Well first of all congratulations. There were no home pregnancy tests in these day. You had to make an appointment at the family planning clinic.You always wanted to be a mum, always wanted lots of children. Well wow your first baby is still under a year old when you found out that baby number two is on the way. Well now your second daughter is here and a month old, and your first born is now approaching nineteen months old, so what have you learnt that you wish you knew before No1 was born that is going to help now No2 is here? 

DD2 at 3 weeks old

Well to start with I think the most important lesson is to accept any and all offers of help that come your way. Try not to be stubborn and independent, people that offer help  only do so because they want to help. Having two children in terry nappies, living in a top floor flat with no washing machine, getting out to the drying green to peg out more dripping wet washing is a nightmare. let one of your friends or relatives take a load  away and bring it back clean and dried. 

Secondly they grow up far to quick, Child number one  was walking before she was a year old, talking in sentences already and far to clever for her own good. Enjoy them while they are young, worry less about the house and what people think of your abilities as a young mum, you can still be a good mum even if there is a layer of dust on the tv or some dirty dishes in the sink. 

DD1 at 27 months and DD2 at 9 months 

Sleep when they sleep, or at least sit and relax in the quiet gaps in the day. Yes I know it is  not quite so easy with a second one as the chance of getting two of them to sleep at the same time during the day is nearly impossible, but if it does happen rather than thinking you can get x.y.and z done, make your self a cup of coffee and a slice of toast or something else to eat, you are no good to anybody worn to a frazzle. 

Do you really need to bring in your first born and change her because she got grubby in the garden? Creating yourself more washing than is needed. If she goes to bed clean every night then clean dirt harms nobody, relax and let the poor child enjoy herself. 

18 months and a 3rd birthday 

Do not feel guilty when the in-laws come in and comment on the fact your husband is doing the ironing which is woman's work, just let them think what they want. Running a house with two young children is team work. 

So breast feeding did not work out, nothing there to feel guilty about, your first bottle fed baby is still alive and growing, healthy, intelligent and well adjusted no reason No2 will not be the same. 

You don't need enough clothes to change your child four times a day for the first year with some of them never worn. Don't keep good clothes for good, as they out grow the clothes before they get enough wear out of them to justify the cost of good. 

A play pen is an essential, even if it is to pop the baby in in her bouncy chair to stop the older child squeezing her feet to make her cry whenever you leave the room. A coach built pram is worth its weight in gold, as you get more than one child out of it, it comfortably takes a pram seat leaving the shopping trolley at the bottom for the shopping when you have to walk over two miles to the nearest supermarket. 

But I think the most important piece of advice is listen to your instincts, these are your children and you know them best. Part of listening to your instincts is knowing when they are ill. Have to say if my 40 year old self could have said to my 19 yr old self your second born will finish school, go on to university and become a successful person with a huge diversity of friends then I may well have worried less about the years she spent in and out of hospital and the operations and treatments she had, but that is another blog post. 

A parent usually knows best when their child is not well and what medication and natural remedies work best. One of them is Vicks BabyRub. It is a soothing moisturising product that you massage in. We all know how important baby massage is to help both the parents and the baby  bond and relax. 

Vicks BabyRub is great after a bath, before bedtime, if baby is irritable or unwell. The product contains natural ingredients - Rosemary, Lavender and Aloe Vera so can be used an time of the day especially great when they are teething or unsettled and massage is great if they are over tired, much better to spend five minutes massaging cream in than an hour getting both baby and parent stressed because baby won't stop crying. 
Vicks BabyRub is a non medicated product for babies six months and older. 

This post is an entry for BritMums #VicksBabyRub Challenge, sponsored by Vicks BabyRub. Specially designed for babies aged 6 months and over, Vicks BabyRub is available at Boots, Superdrug, Tesco, Asda, Waitrose and all good pharmacy chains. RRP £3.99.


  1. It is amazing how much we learn along the way and I loved your tips for a first-time mum. Commenting for myself and on behalf of BritMums and thanking you for taking part

  2. I loved reading this article! I know that raising a child was so so much harder than nowadays, I heard some of the struggles that my mom had while raising me.


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